Wednesday, September 14, 2011


Do you remember this goal of mine? well it was a big big fail! I am embarrassed to say that I am almost finished with DEUTERONOMY!! Ugh, so embarrassed, especially because I inspired people to read the bible in 90 days AND THEY FINISHED! ugh, even more humiliation.
 I have great intentions. "I am going to do this. I am going to finish. I am going to conquer." But I don't. WOW typing that last sentence hurt.

PS- I start work at 6:30.

If I could plan my day perfectly here is how it would go

wake up
spend time with God (scripture/prayer/listening)
get ready (actually do my hair and makeup)
go to work  (well ok in a REAL PERFECT WORLD I WOULD BE A STAY AT HOME MOM/WIFE) make dinner (after work obviously)
do daily/weekly chores
take Porkchop on a walk
photograph/edit daily
blog daily
cuddle time with husband

but can I stick to this? NOPE. Not even close! I can hardly even wake up some days! And honestly I think that is too much in one day. I would need a rotating schedule. Or cut work out all together! :)

 I don't even wake up with enough time to shower in the morning.  I am just so inconsistant it is frustrating to me. I really want to make some HUGE changes in my life. God needs to be first in my life, and right now, he isn't. I am upset with myself that I didn't read the bible in 90 days, and that I haven't made a huge dent in it even, and it has been almost a year. I am sad that I haven't lost weight and I have been wanting to for 9 months (is when i said i was gonna get serious about it). I am just really realizing all my let downs lately. I have been busy with photography and I do love(love love love love) that, and find that I don't have enough time to do all I want to with that even! I want to do crafts too!  I want to cook random things! I want to clean more often, I want to visit with friends and family I want to watch tv!

So what do I do? How can I make this happen? How can I make myself live a life that I want to live? You know.. .besides cutting working out of my schedule. :)  That is another thing, I would love to work and make money so we could travel! So we could go on little excursions and big excursions!

I tend to lean on the whole all or nothing thing. I am not sure, does that work for people ever? I like it that way, but will that work for me? How do I find something that will work for me? where do i give? what do I take? How can I make it all happen? I need to make lots of changes and big changes, but I just am not sure how yet...


1 comment:

  1. You know me, I'm a huge schedule and lists person. I love to know my schedule in advance, and I LOVE to check things of my to-do list. It's that feeling of crossing off something that really helps keep me on task. When I see a huge lists with nothing crossed off I know I need some major motivation, and fast! Have you thought about a family binder with calendars, to-do lists, goals, meal planners, ect? Something that you can look at each morning when you wake up and know what's up ahead, and continue to update through out the week? If you need ideas or help, you know where to go ;)